Laine Ferguson is a Millennial Mom-of-Two, Birth Doula & Childbirth Educator based in Nelson, BC, Canada. Through her work supporting expecting and postpartum families, she is passionate about helping parents feel informed and empowered in their fertility journey. Laine brings an approachable, evidence-informed perspective to conversations about fertility, birth, and postpartum recovery - rooted in both professional experience and her lived-experience of modern motherhood.
If you’re nearing the end of your pregnancy, chances are you’ve started thinking about how your labour will unfold. Maybe you’ve downloaded a contraction timer app, started a hospital bag list, or began drafting a birth plan.
All of those things can be helpful. But as a Birth Doula, I often tell my clients that the most meaningful birth preparation doesn’t need to be exhaustive (or exhausting), it just needs to be intentional.
Preparing for birth isn’t about controlling every detail or guaranteeing a particular outcome. Birth by its nature is unpredictable. Instead, preparation is about building knowledge, confidence, and flexibility so that when your labour begins, you feel ready to navigate any twists and turns (there are usually at least a couple!).
Much like learning about your fertility or tuning into your body’s signals throughout your cycle, preparing for birth is about body literacy - understanding what your body (and mind) is capable of and how to support it through this powerful physiological process.
Here are 3 things I wish more pregnant folks knew about preparing for birth before labour begins:
1. Birth Preparation Starts Long Before Labour
When people think about preparing for birth, they often picture the final weeks of their pregnancy - wrapping up work tasks, installing the car seat (and then reinstalling the car seat), packing the hospital bag, and then waiting for contractions to start.
But the preparation that most impacts our experience of labour and birth often begins weeks, or even months earlier.
One of the most helpful things you can do during pregnancy is learn how physiological labour actually works. Understanding the stages/phases of labour, learning about different comfort measures, and how the soup of labour hormones help the body progress (and cope) through birth can help reduce fear and uncertainty when labour starts.
Physical preparation is important - yes. But just as important (or moreso) is mental preparation.
Labour is an intense physical process, but the mindset you bring into it can have a powerful impact on how you experience it. Feeling supported, and mentally prepared can help reduce fear and make it easier to work with, not against, your body during labour. Many folks zero-in on the physical aspects of preparing for birth (stretching, pelvic floor health, movement etc.), all of which are hugely beneficial. However, while those tools can be really helpful, building a calm and confident mindset is key.
Reminder: Your body is wise, don’t let your own mind convince you otherwise.
Okay. So, this doesn’t mean that you need to become an expert in mindfulness to have a positive birth experience, you don’t. Preparing your mind looks different for everyone, but might include:
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Learning what normal labour sensations feel like
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Talking through common fears or concerns ahead of time with your healthcare provider, doula, or friends
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Practicing relaxation or visualization techniques (Tip: Many apps offer free trials. Sample a few a see what resonates with you.)
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Building trust in your body’s innate wisdom and ability to give birth
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Surrounding yourself with a supportive birth team
For example, many first-time parents are surprised to learn that early labour can last a while… even days. Contractions may start irregularly and build in intensity/frequency over hours, or stop altogether. Knowing this ahead of time can help you stay calm and comfortable at home, for longer, vs. rushing to the hospital. Staying at home in early labour helps the happy-lovey labour hormones flow. Feeling safe, relaxed, and supported encourages the release of oxytocin - the hormone that promotes contractions and helps labour progress.
Mental preparation can also include learning about different labour positions, practicing breathing techniques (again, choose what works for you), or discussing comfort measures with your support person, partner, or doula.
No amount of labour prep (physical or mental) can ensure a specific outcome in your birth. But, it can help you move into labour with familiarity and confidence.
As I often share with my clients, mental birth prep is like packing your hospital bag. You may not use every item you pack (you very likely won’t), but knowing you have a bag full of ‘all the things’ to grab if you need, can help put your mind at ease.
2. Think in Terms of Birth Preferences, not a Birth Plan
Inevitably, at some point, you’ll be told you should think about making a birth plan.
Birth plans can be incredibly helpful when they’re used as a way to explore a path of options and help unpack what most to you. BUT, sometimes the idea of a “plan” can unintentionally create pressure/fear/disappointment if birth takes a different path.
A more flexible and empowering approach is to think in terms of birth preferences.
Ask yourself: “If presenting with [insert choice here], would I prefer [Option A] or [Option B]? Why do I feel that way?”
Birth preferences focus on understanding your options while recognizing that pregnancy and labour can take different paths. Rather than mapping out every possible scenario, you’re taking note of the things that matter most to you, discussing them with your birth partner, and communicating your preferences to your care team.
Some of these preferences to unpack can include:
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How do I want my labour to start? How do I feel about induction?
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What kinds of comfort measures do I want to try? Am I open, or opposed to medication for pain management?
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What do I want my birth space to look/feel like? Who is in the room?
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How do I want to give birth? In what positions? Water birth? Who do I want to catch my baby?
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If a belly birth/c-section were necessary, do I have any preferences for the procedure?
- After the birth of my baby, are there any routine newborn procedures I would/wouldn’t like performed?
Discussing these topics with your care provider ahead of time can help to address any areas of disconnect, if there are any. These conversations also help you to understand what options are available and supported at your chosen birthplace (hospital, birth centre, home etc.).
Include your birth partner in these conversations so they can fully understand your preferences and help advocate for you during your labour and birth. As a birth doula, I often remind my clients that the most empowering birth plans aren’t rigid documents, they’re intentional conversations about your values and priorities.
When parents understand all of their options (and the risks/benefits of each option), they often feel more confident if birth takes an unexpected turn. Flexibility doesn’t mean you’re unprepared (or you don’t know what you want) - it’s often a sign that you’ve invested in your preparation.
3. Preparing for Birth Also Means Preparing for Postpartum
We spend so (so) much time in our pregnancy preparing for birth, we often overlook (and undervalue) the planning that is needed in the postpartum period.
The early weeks with a newborn can be blissful, but they can sometimes be intense and overwhelming. Parents are often navigating sleep deprivation, physical recovery, hormonal fluctuations, feeding challenges, and the emotional adjustment of integrating a new (and super cute) human into their lives.
Taking time during pregnancy to make a postpartum plan can make those early days feel so much more manageable.
Some things to think about before labour begins include:
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Food. We have to eat. How are we going to manage that?
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Food (again). Our baby has to eat. How do we plan to feed our baby? What happens if we’re having challenges with our Plan A?
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Sleep. We need to sleep. Typically, babies make sleeping more challenging. What can we do to ensure I/we have some protected sleep time, everyday?
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What types of day-to-day responsibilities might require more support (shopping, household tasks etc.) or outside help (hired or from friends or family)?
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How are we going to support our other older kiddos and fur babies?
- Who are the other perinatal service providers (lactation consultants, therapists, chiropractors etc.) in our area that we may need to access?
I also encourage my clients to make a list of what needs to happen, and what doesn’t actually need to happen. Simply lowering expectations for yourself in the postpartum period can make a huge difference in how you feel that you are coping. The early weeks after birth are meant to be a time of recovery, bonding, and adjustment - make space for this to happen and let go of what isn’t essential to you.
In many cultures around the world, new parents are supported through a period of rest and community care after birth. While modern life and family geography doesn’t always make that easy, intentionally planning support can help recreate some of that structure.
When parents feel supported in postpartum, they often reflect more positively on their birth experience as well. In other words, one of the best ways to prepare for birth is actually preparing for life with your baby afterwards.
The TLDR; Preparation Builds Confidence
Birth rarely goes “to plan”. But intentional preparation during pregnancy can help parents step into labour and birth with a stronger sense of trust in themselves and their bodies.
Preparation isn’t about trying to control the outcome. It’s about:
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Understanding the physiological process of labour and birth
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Learning about what options and choices are available to you
- Cultivating a support system that helps you feel held and empowered
When those pieces are in place, many parents find they’re able to enjoy and be more present in their labour and birth. The confidence that comes with birth preparation can make a difference in how birth feels - regardless of how it plays out.
If you’re preparing for birth and want personalized, evidence-based support, Laine offers Virtual 1:1 Childbirth Education and Birth Planning sessions designed to help you unpack your preferences, and feel empowered and ready for birth. For families local to the West Kootenays, I also provide in-person Labour & Birth Support in Nelson, BC, offering continuous support throughout your pregnancy, birth and postpartum journey.
Book at FREE consultation at thebirthlaine.com or connect with her @thebirthlaine.